


Blood On His Hands

by halebarnes, StarkRogers135



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Awesome Bobby, Blood Loss, Blood and Injury, Bobby Feels, Dead Sam, Dean in Denial, Demon Sam Winchester, Dying Sam, Ghost Sam, Hurt Sam Winchester, John Winchester Being an Asshole, M/M, Parent John Winchester, Parental Bobby Singer, Protective Dean Winchester, Young Dean Winchester, Young Sam Winchester, season 1-2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-29 15:29:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3901429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halebarnes/pseuds/halebarnes, https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarkRogers135/pseuds/StarkRogers135
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Sam are hunting demons and Sam gets possessed and killed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Even if Dean and Sam were looking for their dad, they still had their own job with hunting to do. They were hunting a demon nest. Sam suggested splitting up but Dean didn't think that was such a good idea. "Sam, one of us could get hurt and you want to split up?" Dean asked. "And don't give me that 'We'll cover more ground crap', either. I don't think this is one of your brightest ideas. We are dealing with a _nest_ of _demons_."

Sam looked around with a sigh. "Look. If I'm able to close off the doors with salt, they can't get out and we can take care of them easier, that's all I'm saying. I can take care of myself." He rolled his eyes, grabbing the bag of rock salt from the trunk.

"And all _I'm_ saying is that something could easily backfire and shoot you in the ass," Dean grunted. "What if you get possessed and I do? Dammit, Sam, you need to think about this stuff. I just think we should wait for Dad."

"We don't need dad for everything." Sam argued. "We can do this ourselves." He said firmly.

"What if we can't with this hunt?" Dean scowled, huffing when Sam started walking towards the building. "Dammit, Sam!" Dean growled, running after his brother.

Sam came to a halt, turning to face his brother. "There's also another thing that's good about dad not being here for this."

Dean furrowed his brows, looking at Sam. "What are you talking about, Sam?" Dean said slowly, holding his gun in his one hand tightly.

"I couldn't do this." Sam walked forward, grabbing Dean's face in his hands and pressing his lips to his brother's.

Dean gasped in surprise. He took a moment to register what was happening before he leaned into the kiss, gripping Sam's hair.

Sam grinned against Dean's lips, stepping forward a little to get closer. He kissed him for a few more moments before pulling away and resting his forehead against Dean's, his lips gently brushing against the other's.

Dean panted, whining slightly at the separation of their mouths. "Jesus..." he breathed, now registering the feeling of a wall behind him. When did he get pressed against the wall? Didn't matter. "God, I love you, Sammy..." Dean said once he caught he breath again.

Sam smiled, looking Dean in the eyes now. "I love you too, Dean." He exhaled sharply. "Now, how about we get this done so we can get outta here?" He tugged on Dean's jacket a little.

Dean grinned. "Yeah," he said. "C'mon. I wanna get back to the motel after this and finish when we left off before you rudely pulled away." Dean joked.

"We had a case to take care of." The younger Winchester hummed, smirking a little. He pulled back and grabbed the rock salt. "Now, we get to work."

Dean nodded, grabbing his own bag of salt. Dean started lining the windows and doors with salt, waiting until Sam finished. While he waited, Dean started scoping the place out. It seemed a little too quiet.

Sam lined the windows and doors with salt and sighed, nodding. "That should do it." He turned around, stopping in his tracks when someone was in front of him. "D-" He was cut off when he was hit and knocked to the ground, a black smoke entering his body.

Dean tensed when he heard a thud, running to where he heard the noise Sent from my iPhone

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just trip over my damn feet." Sam sighed, annoyed. "We should go take care of this."

"You sure?" Dean asked, helping his brother up. "You're not that much of a clutz."

"Dude, I got excited." Sam huffed, dusting himself off.

Dean snorted a laugh. "Excited?" he grinned. "Excited about what?"

"I got everything closed off and I'm ready to get this over with so we can get back to the motel." Sam nodded.

"Good," Dean nodded. "This place seems really quiet. I thought this was supposed to be a full nest."

"They're probably hiding." Sam shrugged. "Hey, I'm gonna put the bags in the trunk. Just click this on my phone," He held it out. "And it'll sent them running. I recorded an exorcism on it."

Dean nodded. He waited until Sam gave him the signal before sticking his arm into the building and pressed play on the recording.

Sam stood at the car, watching the fire burn up the souls of the demons. He smirked a little then put the bags in the trunk, grabbing a knife out before closing it. He hid it in his sleeve and walked over to Dean the second the exorcism was over.

Dean closed the gave the phone back to Sam. "Glad that's over with, y'know?" Dean huffed.

"Yeah." Sam grinned, putting his phone back in his pocket. "Hey, call Dad. See where he's at."

Dean blinked and looked up at Sam. "Thought you said you didn't want him here?" Dean said. Something seemed off about Sam but Dean couldn't point out what it was.

"I don't. I just want to know." He rolled his eyes and went to the building, looking through the window.

"Um...alright..." Dean mumbled, taking his phone out and dialing his father's number.

When he saw Dean hang up, Sam walked back over and pulled his brother to him. "What'd he say?"

"He's about thirty minutes away from us." Dean confirmed.

"Hm, thirty minutes. What could we do in thirty minutes?" Sam smirked a little.

"Yeah?" Dean hummed, tracing Sam's abdomen through the shirt he was wearing.

"I have an idea." Sam grinned, eyes turning black.

Dean's eyes grew wide and he ripped himself from dams embrace, pulling his gun out of the waistband of his jeans. "Get the hell out of him!" Dean growled.

The demon made a clicking noise. "You shoot me, you kill Sammy. Dean, you know that."

Dean grunted hard. "I said to get out of him." Dean growled.

"I'm afraid I can't do that. I want you Winchesters dead and the only way to do that is to take out the one you both love the most." The demon hummed, pulling out a knife. "He's screaming. Telling you to shoot him and kill me. Oh, the thoughts and memories I can see."

"Don't. Please don't," Dean said quickly, his heart pounding hard in his chest.

"Wow. You two have a very damn close relationship. He really loves you, y'know. He wants to do so many things with you. Kiss you, hug you, _die_ for you." The demon talked, twirling the knife in his hand.

Dean's breath caught in his throat, staring at the dangerously sharp in his the demon's hand. "Please," Dean said again. "Drop the knife. Now."

The demon sighed and nodded. "Fine." He shrugged, holding the knife out. He quickly stabbed Sam in the stomach, moving the knife a little to make a cut before dropping it.

"No!" Dean yelled, his stomach dropping and twisting. This wasn't supposed to be happening. Sam wasn't supposed to get possessed and he wasn't supposed to get stabbed!

The demon laughed then grinned, leaving Sam's body and letting it drop. Sam whined and tried sitting up, holding his stomach. "Oh, god."

Dean ran over over to Sam, pressing his hand against the gushing stab wound. "Shh...hey..." Dean said. "Calm down. Dad's gonna be here a-and we'll get you to a hospital."

Sam coughed and shook his head. "'M not gonna make it to a hospital. I should have-I should have listen to you. I'm sorry." He huffed.

Dean grunted when Sam fell against him. "Don't talk like that," Dean said, blood pooling out around his hand. "Shit." he whispered.

Sam chuckled, wincing and looking at his blood covered hands. "I tried to stop it. I should have listened to you." He coughed, blood coming from his mouth now. Sam gripped Dean's shirt. "Guess we're not gonna be able to go back to the motel after all." He laughed, clearly in pain now.

"Shut up," Dean said, fighting his tears back. He adjusted Sam in his arms and pressed his hand harder to his brother's stomach. "Dad is gonna get here 'nd your gonna be fine."

Sam winced as he was adjusted and hummed in pain. "You know I'm not." His eyes started getting heavy. "Dean, what the demon said was right. I do love you. God, I love you so much." He let out a sob.

"Please hold on and wait for Dad," Dean pleaded. "Hey. Hey! You keep your eyes open, dammit!"

Sam blinked, opening his eyes and sat up a little, adjusting himself. "Dad's not gonna get here in time, Dean. You know it."

"Stop it." Dean choked out, feeling the wetness fill his eyes. Dean looked up as if he'd see John. Dean pulled his plaid shirt off and pressed it to Sam's stomach, his own hand covered in blood.

Sam cringed at the new pressure on his wound, gasping a little, his breathing uneven now. "What we got? Like ten min..." He paused, coughing up more blood. "...utes, before Dad gets here?"

Dean felt the tears finally falling down his face. "Sammy, please," Dean begged. "I can't go on without you."

"Liar. Yes, you can." Sam rolled his eyes. "Just...Keep hunting. You and dad keep hunting. Save some people." He nodded. "Look, I can see his headlights." He looked down the road.

"Who says I want to keep going without you?" Dean whimpered, pressing the bloody shirt to Sam's stomach. "We'll get you to a hospital. You're going to be fine."

"I do. You need to." Sam pleaded, shaking his head. He coughed, his body relaxing. "It doesn't hurt anymore."

"Dammit, Sam, you're not giving up!" Dean cried, pressing his face into Sam's hair. "Please!"

Sam nudged his head against Dean's and slowly went limp in his brother's arms, darkness covering his eyes. "I love you." He muttered, taking his last breath.

"Sam? S-Sammy?" Dean choked. "C'mon, man, wake up. Sam!" Dean yelled, gripping Sam's shirt. Dean clung to his brother, even when he heard Dad's truck shut off.

John got out of the truck and rushed over, stopping when he got close. "Dean, what happened?"

"It's your fault he's dead!" Dean yelled angrily. "If you'd gotten here sooner, Sam would still be alive!"

"Don't blame this on me. He was your responsibility while I wasn't here. This is on you." John argued.

"If you really cared, Dad, you would have hauled your ass here. That's if your really cared about your kids." Dean growled, ignoring the tears that still fell and the blood on his hands and jeans.

"I care about both of you, more than you'll ever know." John's jaw clenched. "There was a slight hold up. Those demons you were supposed to take care of? Three of 'em got out. This is your fault, Dean."

Dean breathed hard, looking away Sent from my iPhone

He sighed. "Dean, we need to get him out of here." John said after a few moments of silence.

Dean was silent for a long moment before he picked Sam up, one arm under his brother's knees and the other behind his shoulders, Sam's head against Dean's chest, while he carried Sam to the Impala, laying him down in the backseat, wiping his bloody hands on his jeans and shirt.

John sighed heavily and went to his truck, driving off.

"God, I fucking hate him." Dean said tearfully, starting to drive to the motel. When Dean got to the motel, he saw Dad's truck. "You've gotta be joking." Dean scowled, gripping the steering wheel.

John waited by his truck for Dean to get out.

"Why the hell are you here?" Dean snapped.

"I came to check on my son. We need to burn him, Dean." John frowned.

Dean breathed out a bitter laugh. "There is no _we_ , Dad," Dean said. "Just turn around and go back to wherever the hell you can from."

"My _son_ is dead. I'm not just going to leave!" The eldest Winchester's brow furrowed.

"My _brother_ is dead because you weren't there in time, dammit." Dean grunted. "Sam even said he didn't need you. So what does that tell you? Huh? Just leave."

"I'm not leaving." John protested. "Now, get in the damn car and drive so we can take care of this."

"No," Dean said dryly. "Sam wouldn't want you there." Dean grumbled.

"Quite frankly, I don't care." John shrugged.

"You are a horrible father," Dean scowled. "I hope you know that and I hope you're fucking proud."

"I'm not a terrible father. I did the best I could for the both of you. Dean, this blood is on your hands because you didn't make sure he was safe." John clenched his jaw.

"How was I supposed to stop a demon from possessing him?" Dean yelled, his hands shaking in anger.

"Make sure he didn't go off on his own. You know how long he's been out of hunting." John frowned.

"I tried to convince him." Dean huffed, turning around and pressed his forehead to the Impala, fresh tears in his eyes again.

"And you didn't press harder?" John asked.

"I tried." Dean huffed.

John nodded a little. "He was a stubborn ass." He huffed, lightly laughing.

"Yeah." Dean said, his voice low and gruff. He didn't laugh at his father's comment even if it was true.

"Fine. You take care of it then." John finally agreed.

From John's angle, it looked like Dean was cringing when he actually just wanted to curl up and cry. He just wanted his brother back so bad.


	2. Chapter 2

After Dean had burned Sam's body, he immediately went back to his motel room. After he washed his bloody hands and shirt, he curled up on Sam's bed. Dean grunted when he heard his phone go off , blindly grabbing it and answering without looking at who it was. "Hello?" he mumbled, Bobby on the other end.

"Hey, Dean. How's it goin'?" Bobby asked, clearly shaken up from the news he had received from John.

"Horrible." Dean grunted weakly into the pillow. His eyes were red from crying so badly.

"Yeah. Look, if you ever wanna talk or just come over to have a couple beers, I'll be here. I just wanted t'check up on ya." Bobby sighed, looking at John and shaking his head.

"Not in the talkin' mood but I'll come over." Dean said quietly, rubbing his face.

"That's fine. You don't have to." Bobby agreed with a nod.

"Thanks, Bobby." Dean mumbled quietly and hung up. Dean sat up with a grunt, rubbing his red eyes. Dean grabbed his keys and went to the Impala, driving to Bobby's in absolute silence, his music not even on.

When Dean arrived, Bobby opened the door. "Good t'see you, boy." He said with a sigh of relief, shutting the door.

"Yeah, same to you, Bobby." Dean said quietly, not even attempting a smile. He couldn't even fake one. Dean didn't react when he saw his father in the kitchen.

"Dean-" John started but Bobby held up a hand.

"He said he didn't want to talk, so we're not gonna make him." Bobby nodded.

Dean had chosen to wear Sam's large jacket instead of his own leather one. The jacket still smelled like Sam and that comforted Dean at least a little bit. Dean sat at the kitchen table, hands shoved into the coat pockets, and quietly thanking Bobby when the man put an open beer bottle in front of him.

Bobby nodded, sitting down in his chair and took a sip from his beer.

Dean just stared at his beer before he looked up when he heard his father say his name. Dean didn't want to talk. He didn't even really have to listen.

"You're gonna have to speak some time." John crossed his arms.

Dean's frown kept it's place on Dean's mouth, just looking at him. "Why?" Dean mumbled quietly, his voice cracking a bit from how dry his mouth was.

"Because you're not going to get any better unless you do." John shrugged.

"'nd you're not gonna get any nicer if y'keep being bitter." Dean said quietly, his hands still shoved into the pockets on Sam's jacket.

John sighed, shaking his head.

Dean picked his beer up and took a long drink from it before putting it down again, resuming to stare at the table, only to hear Bobby speak.

"John, let the boy talk when he wants to. He just lost his brother." Bobby sighed, seeing John finally nod.

Dean had found out that John had a room next to Dean's at the motel, which didn't make Dean feel any more safe or happy. When John tried to follow Dean into the room, Dean slammed it in his father's face.

John rolled his eyes and went to his room with a sigh, shutting the door and turning in for the night.

Dean threw on one of Sam's Stanford College shirts and just wore his own black boxer briefs to bed. Dean curled up in Sam's bed, pulling the blankets over his chest. By midnight, Dean started to get restless, tossing and turning and huffing lightly in his sleep. He wasn't sure how thick or thin the walls were but if he was about to have a nightmare, Dean highly doubted that John would come to help.

There was something different about the air the moment Dean started tossing and turning. It was Sam. He was still there, tethered to something.

"Dean." His image flickered in and out before appearing fully.

"No," Dean grunted, sweat on his face. "No. S-Sam, no." he grunted, kicking his legs some.

Sam frowned, walking over and touching his brother's shoulder. "Dean, wake up."

Dean jerked awake, breathing heavily. "Wh-What?" he breathed. "S-S'mmy?"

Sam smiled, sitting on the foot of the bed. "Hey, Dean." He sighed. Sam worked hard in the time between his death and now to become visible. He was now to the point where people could touch and their hand not go through him.

"N-No," Dean said shakily. "You're dead. H-How are you here?" he mumbled, feeling tears slowly roll down his face. Dean flinched when he felt Sam's thumb touch his face and wipe the tears away.

"I am dead. I'm just a ghost. I'm tied to something here, I dunno what though." Sam shrugged, moving over to his brother.

Dean flinched when Sam moved closer. "Your laptop?" he said shakily, pressing his hands to his eyes. When he opened his eyes, his brother was still there and it make his chest tighten.

Sam shrugged. "I have no idea." He shook his head, placing his hands in his lap. "I've been here the whole time."

"What do you mean?" Dean asked quietly, pulling one knee to his chest.

"Meaning, I've been with you since I died." He smiled a little.

"Why didn't you make yourself known then?" Dean asked. "Did you not want Dad seeing you? Or Bobby?" he mumbled.

"I just got this thing to working right." Sam chuckled, motioning to himself. "I wanted to get it fully working before I appeared. I didn't want to disappear on you."

"Right..." Dean said quietly, nodding slowly and narrowing his eyes. "Sammy, I miss you, man." Dean said, his voice cracking.

Sam frowned, reaching up to cards his fingers through his brother's hair. "I'm sorry, Dean."

Dean nodded shakily, wiping his tears with shaking hands. "I-If  
I hadn't burned your body, I-I would've found a way to bring you back. I need you back."

"No, you don't." Sam sighed heavily. "You're fine without me. You and Dad need to make amends. Just because I'm dead, doesn't mean to stray from family."

"Dad and I fight so damn much," Dean said. "It was worse when you went off to college. I don't want to keep going without you, man. I _can't_!"

"Dean, you can!" Sam nodded. "I was at Stanford and you were _fine_."

"You didn't know what I went through while you were gone at college," Dean shook his head. "Don't give me that."

"You'll live." Sam stated.

"Shut up." Dean grunted, looking away from Sam.

Sam shook his head a little then frowned against as his image became to blink.

"S-Sam?" Dean said, looking up again. "W-What's going on?" he mumbled.

"I'm not able to hold my image for very long. I've held it the best I could for the moment." He sighed.

Dean let out a little whimper noise. "You'll still be here, though?" he asked.

Sam smiled and nodded. "Yeah."

Dean nodded warily, biting his bottom lip when he was alone again, laying back against the pillows again and staring at the wall.


End file.
